Having just settled in for a nice, relaxing night of watching false humans wave their hands and bear their gums at each other, many viewers of last night’s election debate were greatly disappointed to find that their tepid evening’s entertainment was being recklessly enlivened by a creaking floorboard.
In amongst the forest of stiff, disingenuous bleating that was on show from the candidates, the creak itself stood out as one of the less wooden or strained things about the entire evening. Viewers immediately took to Twitter to do those two things that Twitter still enables its users to do quite well: comment on events quicker than established media sources, and make appalling, torturous puns about those events.
One such user, Gerry Adams, used his account to own up to being the source of the creak, with the sort of meandering, non-sequitur laden folksiness that has started to make his Twitter feed look automatically generated.
RG Sez I shud tell ye that the creak on the Leaders Debate was my sore back. He is right. Oiche mhaith xoxozzzzzzz.
— Gerry Adams (@GerryAdamsSF) February 24, 2016
Although originally considered a wacky joke, inseparable from other witty pronouncements such as “I am not and never have been a member of ISIS” or his spirited attack on the practice of putting beans in a fry, Adams’ claim to have been behind the creak turned out to have been sincere, as his political adviser Seán Mac Brádaigh later clarified.
Even after this revelation, however, there was one dissenting voice left claiming credit: the twitter account of the floor itself.